There are two topics I rarely engage in debate about: religion and politics. I avoid these controversial topics, because I’ve learned I can’t debate them without losing my temper (and often a friendship) in the process. As such, I avoid blogs on these topics. Logical, yes?
Why, then, am I willing to take time out of my workday to follow discussions on blogs where folks argue relentlessly on the same unresolvable topics ad nauseam — often talking to themselves through a variety-pack of cloaked identities. Sure, rather than talking about religion or politics, they’re talking about low-paying writing jobs, writing for free, or whether or not writer-blogs should contain curse words. But isn’t this just as bad, if not worse?
Why are we willing to play along with these things online, simply because it comes from a blog within our niche? Because we justify it as a career-benefiting learning experience? Because it comes from the mouth (fingers?) of someone everyone else in our field seems to respect?
Or do we just crave controversy?
Has the fact that we’ve trapped ourselves behind computer screens all day, devoid of human interaction, when we would rather be outside playing caused us to mutate into degenerates? Do we really have nothing better to do? Or is it the false sense of anonymity online that feeds our silly impulses?
My theory is that it is simply human nature to want to stick around and watch things go up in flames. A car crashes on one side of the highway, and ten other cars pile up on the other side because the drivers’ impulses were to turn and look. A tornado comes through the sky, and the neighbors line up outside with video cameras. Idiocy seems to be part of the human experience; otherwise, why would we need so many Idiot’s Guides and For Dummies books?
I think I attract a pretty intelligent, self-respecting crowd here. So I would love to know your thoughts. Are you put off by controversy on the blogs you read, or do you dip right in to join the debate? Are there hot topics you won’t touch, or do you happily post controversy on your own blogs?
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I think truth should be sought for in all walks of life, including the virtual life, online, in comments, forums, etc. Controversial topics will always attract wacko people, and often this will spoil any real benefit these conversations can have; because, honestly, conversations on religion and spirituality can yield some of the best personal benefits. If these conversations get out of hand, step out. Whether your self-control or addiction to such things will allow you to step away depends.
I actually enjoy a little debate every now and then. It flexes my critical thinking muscles and more importantly, it’s a good way to learn different perspectives and sometimes through such debates, you adopt new (better) beliefs or ways of looking at things. Especially with politics and religion, how can a person continue to hold a belief if they aren’t able to defend, debate, or argue it?
I know, I know: faith. It’s all well and good but I’m not sure it should be blind.
Melissa Donovan’s last blog post..An Introduction to Slam Poetry
I don’t mind a little respectful controversy. But at the same time, I feel that some topics are “played out.” For example, the whole debate between writing for free, or whether writers should write for Associated Content. I tend to bypass these discussions and look for blog posts that pose new, and more thought provoking “hot topics.” Great post!
Valencia’s last blog post..Companies that Hire Telecommuters: LiveOps Virtual Call Center
Okay, I have a PhD in engineering. So theoretically, I’m supposed to be smart and Edju-cated.
Yet I openly admit, I like car crashes and tornado videos. Gatlin guns, fighter jets, propane tanks going off. I love those Fox TV specials “When Circus Animals Explode” or “Top Ten Merry-Go-Round Disasters”.
Being the hairless apes that we are, it’s part of our nasty violent inner nature.
Don’t try to pretend it dosen’t exist…accept it. It’s part of us.
As for controversy. YES! I wish there WAS a bit more.
Don’t get me wrong. I love all my friends. But sometimes the blogsphere gets a little bit too touchy-feely for me.
I mean, it’s great that we’re all supportive and positive with each other. But I find I get tired with the constant feedback that I’m okay, you’re okay, we’re all OKAY.
If all we do is praise each other, then we lose our objectivity and it’s hard to get constructive criticism.
Cath Lawson wrote a recent post about it (Barbie Doll Blogging). Worth reading. She makes a good point.
In the mean time, I’ll continue trying to be best shit-disturber I can be!
Friar’s last blog post..Basil the Special Dog (Update Part II)
Ryan — Thanks for stopping by. I appreciate your input.
Melissa — I know what you mean. I enjoy a good debate, if it’s done in such a way that it is civilized and intelligent. Unfortunately, this rarely seems to be the case online. I’m mostly talking about folks who try to create controversy for the sake of creating controversy, in issues where there is no need to bring the topic up again and again. Valencia’s example of should freelancers write for Associated Content is a good example. In the discussions I’ve seen, things get ugly and there is no resolution. It’s an issue I see as personal preference; if you want to write for AC, go ahead, and if you don’t then don’t. What’s the argument? But some folks will beat that dead horse for six hours a day. And when I run across a blog where this is being discussed, even though I couldn’t care less and have no opinion on the subject beyond what I’ve just stated above, I will still stick around to watch the fight. Why? So silly…
Valencia — Excellent point, and exactly what I was getting at (although you said it better than I). See my comment to Melissa above. At this point, I have started skipping posts that mention these sort of trigger topics, lest I be tempted to hang around to watch how it pans out.
Friar — First of all, I’d love to see the top ten merry go round disaster list.
Secondly, I agree with you on the lovey junk. Being cordial/polite is one thing, but I do get tired of seeing all the sweetness and light on certain blogs, where no one will ever state an opinion for fear they’ll rock the love boat. I suppose one of my big problems with online debates is the way people can’t seem to separate the person from the issue. I could hate everything you stand for but still respect you as a person, but many folks don’t seem to be that way. If someone disagrees with them, or they perceive some slight that isn’t even there, they get all hostile and pitch a tantrum, leading everyone else into a pattern of childishness. At that point, the issue up for debate is pretty much out the window and it’s like watching a pen of beasts go at each other. Meanwhile, I’ll be lurking and want to add my opinion in on the issue, when the moderator or blog owner decides it’s time to lock down the argument and give a lecture about playing nice. I think to myself, “You posted this, knowing there would be a fight (always happens that way), and yet now you’re playing the victim and moaning that your advertisers don’t like to see name-calling.” Totally a waste of time, in my opinion… I’ll have to go find Cath’s post now. 
I tend to sat away from politics and religeon, they get me deep into hot water with certain famimly members(both my sisters and 1 BIL and 1 aunt and uncle)so I jst sit and try to be quiet and let them stick thier foeet in their mouths instead of me doing it. Hugs and God’s Blessings and Love to you my friend! Mike G. said that!(It’s anA.A.thing of mine)
Mike Golch’s last blog post..just a quick note of a sad anniversary.
Mike — That’s funny but true — always better to let someone else stick their foot in their mouth. (I wonder where that expression came from.)
@Amy
I’ve actually held back, and I’ve chosen not to write a few posts.
I think they’re clever, and they’d make a good point. But they might offend half my audience, who might take it personally.
So, even the Friar shows some restraint, and avoids controversy. I hate to admit.
(Though who’s to say that one of these days, I won’t just post them?)
Friar’s last blog post..Basil the Special Dog (Update Part II)
Friar — Maybe we can coordinate Fuckitall day as an international holiday, and we can all post them at the same time.
@Amy
I suggest November 3rd. It’s the Feast of St. Ignatius Fuckitall…the Patron Saint of Recklessness.
Friar’s last blog post..Basil the Special Dog (Update Part II)
Friar — LOL!! Can we move the feast to November 12? That is my birthday. And in order to be a proper scorpio, I must do evil things on my birthday.
Amy,
I think you hit it on the head with this: “it is simply human nature to want to stick around and watch things go up in flames.”
For a lot of people, controversial blog topics work that way. For me, I might read it, but when everybody jumps on the bandwagon I generally lose interest in being active on that post. (Okay, unless I can stir it up some more, he he.)
On my own blog, I like to present things in a surprising way if possible. If you can’t throw a unique light on a subject why speak about it? This occasionally causes mild controversy, but no knock-down drag-out Customer Experience fights.
Things I think will get a howl often don’t, so if I were to court trouble, I’d be terrible at it.
I’m with Friar, and I know that doesn’t surprise him. On some of my fave blogs I get itching for a bit *more* controversy at times. Occassionally it’s like a ladies’ college dorm, several bloggers’ cycles sync and there are too many lovey posts at once… I run when everybody jumps on that bandwagon, too.
Regards,
Kelly
Kelly’s last blog post..Tip of the Week: This One’s for the Boys
Hi Amy - I love the idea of having a FuckItall day as an International holiday.
I like reading controversial posts if they’re interesting. And I will write them if they’re right for my blog. But I will add that I find it difficult to keep my mouth shut when I feel strongly about something offline too and it can sometimes cause me a fair bit of hassle.
Cath Lawson’s last blog post..Don’t Be Like The Women On The Titanic
@Kelly
Yay!!! Another person on my side! (And yes, I realize you’ve agreed with me about this in the past).
I like how you “tell it like it is”, and dont’ try to blow sunshine up our (er) noses. I always respected that.
@Amy
Like many things in the Universe, the Blogosphere works in cycles.
Lately, I’ve noticed the “Touchy Feely” cycle is running a bit high.
But this too shall pass.
In the mean time, I’ll retreat back into my Friar Lair, and shut the windows, close the blinds, and wait for this Universal Group-Hug Estrogen-Fest to be over.
(PS. I’m not trying to being sexist…just observing that most of the Barbie-Bloggers happen to be ladies!)
Friar’s last blog post..Basil the Special Dog (Update Part II)
Oh Friar, is that where you’ve been lately? I can’t help but feel a little guilty. LAtely I’ve needed that touchy-feely support but, yeah, like everyone else, sometimes you want to read and experience something different. It’s not necessarily the controversy that turns me off but the way people tend to get nasty. Generally, I’ll read the post but I won’t always comment.
Because I am a sort of hermit, I don’t have much to write about by way of controversy. I’m done with all the grammar rants and shit like that, so I’m not often riled up about anything. In fact, some days I lament that since working from home I haven’t had anything really interesting to say. One becomes quite self-absorbed, and then one writes only about their day-to-day experiences. At one time I tried reading the news to find ideas, but that didn’t last long! I just couldn’t dredge up enough reaction.
Whoops. Lost power. I love that I didn’t lose my comment, but I had better shut her down. That’s the third time I’ve lost power…
steph’s last blog post..When Peeking is a Good Thing
Kelly and Friar — The ‘bloggers’ cycles sync’ thing made me laugh. Then I got to ‘Group-Hug Estrogen-Fest’ and nearly peed on myself. Nice work.
The funny thing about this is the two touchiest feeliest blogs I read are written by men, so I had to chuckle. I’m certainly not a touchy feely person, but I can’t say it bothers me too much to read it. If it gets nauseating, I just back out of the blog. No where near as annoying to me as folks stirring up trouble just for the sake of hosting a fist-fight. Now if either of you staged a debate, I would be eager to join in. Because neither of you seem to be the catty, hairpulling types. But it would be fun to see how your crowds would debate, on something worth debating, that is. 
Cath — Where are you from? Maybe we can get Fuckitall day spread across the pond and beyond. We’ll have to get Monika in on this too.
Steph — Why so many power outages? I’m totally a hermit (in real life). I’m not above ranting either
but I just do it because I’m pissed off, not because I’m trying to create controversy. I never rant about grammar though, because I’m so bad at it. Hehe.
Oooh, what a timely post. I tend to avoid discussing whether or not writers should utilize bidding sites. I have seen that topic get real ugly quick on forums and other blogs, and I don’t have time for that kind of drama all up in my blog.
Some writers say bidding sites work for them, so who am I to say that they don’t just because it didn’t work for me?
Kimberly Ben’s last blog post..Want New Clients? Market, Market, Market
Kimberly — Thanks for stopping by. That is a PERFECT example of exactly what I’m talking about. Used to, when I’d see a post that asked the question “Do you use bidding sites?” I would answer the question. Then the person who asked the question would jump down my throat, and I’d be like, “So why did you ask?” I do think it could be a good discussion topic, despite the fact that it’s one folks tend to get heated up about. But honestly, out of about 50 or so blog posts I can remember reading on the topic, only one stands out in my mind as one that ended up being a truly useful debate. As in, some folks learned something and other folks eased up their prejudices a little, while others stood by their opinions. But no one got nasty about it, and it wasn’t done just to drive a fight to the site.
Amy, I totally agree. It could be a very useful discussion if folks wouldn’t take the responses of others so personal!
Kimberly Ben’s last blog post..Want New Clients? Market, Market, Market
Kimberly — I completely agree. Watching folks argue online is scary sometimes. People take one little thing the wrong way, and it’s all over. Or one person starts with the personal attacks, gets all defensive over something that wasn’t intended as an insult, and the war begins.
@Amy and Kelly
You want me to stir up trouble:
How about Friar’s Touchy-Feely Blogging Rules:
- When an “A-List” blogger farts, it actually smells like oven-fresh cinnamon buns.
- No one ever posts a bad photo. Whether it’s a pristine moutain scene, or a rusty toilet, it’s the equivalent of an Ansel Adams original. Why isn’t it on the cover of National Geog?
- Everybody who blogs is an exceptionally gifted writer. The only reason we aren’t all Nobel-Prize winning authors, is not that we can’t write, but it’s just that we havent’ been discovered yet.
- Talking about thinking about writing a book will get you the same ammount of praise, as if you had already published it and it’s on the best-seller list.
- If someone gets a hangnail and writes about it, it’s the equivalent of surviving open-heart surgery. Write to the author and and give them your moral support.
- Just the act of reading a quote from some dead philospher is sufficent to cause someone to burst into tears of gratitude and self-discovery.
- The World depends on your Blog. If you miss a post, or you go on vacation without telling your fans, Life as We Know It will end.
Friar’s last blog post..Basil the Special Dog (Update Part II)
Nice work, Fried One.
I especially like the last bit. There are way too many people who think the world will end if they stop blogging about their hangnails. 
Also, I just saw the group hug over a quote thing done, so that made me laugh!
Friar,
I have to say, the bloggers I’m reading whose cycles are synced right now are mainly men, but then, you have such a harem at your blog, if you’re reading your admirers’ blogs you’d probably have a feeling that it’s a women-thing more than I would. Don’t know about that.
It’s not that I don’t like a touch of positivity, just that I’m a realist. Too much of it and I feel like I ate cotton candy for breakfast or something.
Oh, yeah, and the word Barbie makes me break out in a rash.
Add in a touchy-feely rule about how Joe Walsh would be proud of bloggers who become utterly full of themselves when their stats start to go up, but think everyone else has changed, not them, and you’ll have a perfect list.
Except—what’s wrong with quoting dead philosophers? ARE YOU TRYING TO START A FIGHT? ‘Cuz I can go there. Yes, I can. I know Amy wants to see me pull your hair.
Amy,
I think blog posts on either end can get people stirred up for the sake of readership, just like television for ratings. On t.v. you get gloppy-happy and shocking-appalling, both pulling in those who don’t really want to think, just feel.
I’m in it for the long haul, so I’m mainly happy with good, thought-provoking work. Inciting emotions is (usually) lower on the priority list for me.
Until later,
Kelly
Kelly’s last blog post..Observing Brilliant Service
Kelly — On one blog I lurk at regularly, someone posted a quote and about 30 people chimed in with sappy sentiments, as though reading that quote (it wasn’t even a good one) somehow changed their lives. It was very dramatic and Oprah-like.
@Kelly
I’ve actually been jumping around quite a few blogs (not just my “harem”, as you call it)
There is definitely a Global Group Hug going around the plaent, as we speak.
Hey, nothing wrong with that. But from what I’ve seen (at least), it’s mainly women.
That’s not necessarily a bad quality. The fairer sex tends to be more open with expressing their feelings, (as opposed to us knuckle-dragging guys).
But NO. I’m NOT trying to start a fight with you (besides, I’d never win)
Nothing wrong with quoting people. I like these posts when they provoke an interesting open-minded discussion. (I always like to see where your Wednesday posts will go….).
I’m just a little tired about how how some people (not necessarily on your blog) read ten words, and crying and sobbing, write in how this suddenly changed their WHOLE LIFE, etc. etc…
Holy crap. If people are THAT influenced by average Joes like us, how do they survive everyday life, where they’re constantly bombarded with books, movies, and the media?
PS. Barbie bores me. (When I was four, I peeked under her dress). After that, I just stuck to my Hot Wheels.
Friar’s last blog post..Basil the Special Dog (Update Part II)
Friar — Smart man. Rule #1, never fight with a woman who owns pointy shoes. I have seen Kelly’s avatar.
I too often wonder how people survive. For various reasons. But I have to laugh when I think of these people at a bookstore. If they wander into the “inspirational” section, that could cause a major meltdown. No ziggy calendars for them. Nopers.
@Amy
And you see? I ranted about something mildly controversial here, and look at the intersting dicusssion it’s already generated.
PS. Pointy shoes. Ugh.
(Crossing my legs now, out of self-preservation instinct).
Friar’s last blog post..Basil the Special Dog (Update Part II)
Friar’s right, and we know he is, but there is another side to it that bears mentioning.
People write this way and read it, I think, because of the “niceness”, even if it can get over the top from time to time. If it is too much, I’ll go read a tech blog and learn all about computers or something.
On the other hand, why would I go to a blog that tells me I’m ordinary, that tells me I’m a fuck up?
(Not that I am, just an example.)
If I want a realistic, down to earth kick in the nuts, guess what?
All I have to do is go outside. I can go for a walk down the street and see a homeless man, I can have some guy call me an asshole at the crosswalk, I can see a drunk guy.
Shit, I wouldn’t even have to do that. I could just turn on the TV. Hundreds of channels of sensational, depressing news, forgettable sitcoms, predictable dramas…
Or I could just go to work.
Perhaps the nicey-nice blogs could use a little more reality.
But the real world could also use a little more nicey-nice, once in a while.
Brett Legree’s last blog post..viking fridays - everything you always wanted to know about life change*
Food for thought, Friar. Jesus (if you believe in him) was just an average Joe, and still inspires 1/3 of the planet…
From small people, come big ideas.
Brett Legree’s last blog post..viking fridays - everything you always wanted to know about life change*
PS - I forgot to answer your question, Amy, as the comments here took on a life of their own.
Yes, sometimes I do like to jump in for the debate. Sometimes, I just say “meh” and go do something else.
I figure debating is fun. And that’s all it really should be, fun.
Brett Legree’s last blog post..viking fridays - everything you always wanted to know about life change*
Friar — Ah yes, but the difference is that you didn’t write a controversial post simply to stir up trouble with a crowd you know will fight. That’s my big beef. Freelance writers seem to do this a lot. Once a month or so they’ll write a new post to argue about rates, or whatever it is they know will make their blog visitors fight. Then after they get a bunch of comments and a catfight going, they’ll start whining about how they wished people would be nice, because the namecalling and fighting makes them look bad. (Duh. Then stop writing these posts every damn month.)
P.S. I prefer to remain shoeless. But I’ve been wearing $5 flip-flops all summer. I bought them on clearance at Old Navy about five years ago and have warn them all summer every summer since.
Brett — You have some good points. I’m all for “nice” blogs that have an actual purpose. Sometimes even those do get too sappy for me, so I read the post and generally skip the comments section (where the huge hugfest begins). I guess I prefer blogs that are somewhere in the middle. Ones that exist for a real purpose, but that as an aside might occasionally stir up controversy or offer something sentimental.
Friar,
Darn. I wanted to pull some hair.
And Amy has changed my life in some ways, seriously, but I’m not gonna go too huggy about it. Probably.
Amy,
Can I stir the pot and I say I like Oprah, the person, but couldn’t sit through an Oprah show if you tortured me with Barbies and threatened to paint my office walls pink? Too much sappiness.
Brett,
I’m totally inspired by you. Don’t change (not that you would).
I think the overload of blogs doing “uplifting” comes down to clarity of Vision/ direction, which you and I have talked about. When I read a blog where I originally came for X, and find they change to Y in order to pander to bumps in their stats (whether controversy-bumps or mushy-inspiration-bumps), that’s a whole different thing.
Then not only have I gained one more Little Timmy story to slog through in a busy day, but I’ve also lost what I adored about that blog. I think the blogger himself has lost something, too.
Now, from the beginning, what I loved about 6 Weeks was your mixture of inspiration and searching. You are one of exactly two blogs I’m subscribed to for the purpose of thinking about my inner workings. I signed on for that. That is a different thing entirely from losing focus or jettisoning focus in order to chase readership.
Until later,
Kelly
Kelly’s last blog post..Observing Brilliant Service
Amy,
I should make you some shoes…
I agree with you, too - some blogs don’t seem to have much of a purpose. Luckily, it’s a big internet!
Brett Legree’s last blog post..viking fridays - everything you always wanted to know about life change*
@Kelly,
Don’t worry, I won’t change, and thanks - that means a lot to me.
Hope that’s not too touchy-feely for anyone…
I think maybe that’s it. You can almost tell if someone is genuine, or just doing it for the ratings.
(Seriously, thanks for saying that.)
-Brett
Brett Legree’s last blog post..viking fridays - everything you always wanted to know about life change*
@Brett
Hmmm…you make an interesting point.
I wonder…WWJB?
(What would Jesus Blog….if he were alive today?)
Friar’s last blog post..Basil the Special Dog (Update Part II)
I may even have started another controversy here with that one!
Really what I meant was that Jesus was the son of a carpenter, if you forget the whole Son of God thing. But you caught my drift, the idea being the humble guy from a modest background.
While at the same time I laugh because I can see someone viewing a picture of e.g. my cat Bill with a box of mac ‘n cheese balanced on his head, and having an epiphany.
Well, if I were an A-list blogger, that is!
Hmm, this debating stuff is more fun than work, isn’t it…
Brett Legree’s last blog post..viking fridays - everything you always wanted to know about life change*
@Kelly
I’ve said it before. Oprah has WAY TOO MUCH POWER for someone who’s just a simple talk show host.
But since that’s the way it is…what we need to do find some kind of way to tap into that power, and use it to our benefit.
Friar’s last blog post..Basil the Special Dog (Update Part II)
Friar — You might be onto something there. Go to Cafepress.com and make up some WWJB t-shirts. I’ll be they will sell.
Brett — I think you nailed it with your genuine comment. Your posts are inspirational (and have a purpose), but as Kelly says, that is the point of your blog.
But I don’t think your blog is sappy. If a blog’s purpose is to be sappy, I generally just pass. Those blogs do well for their audiences, I’m sure. They’re just not for me. But when, say, a blog that typically offers freelance writing tips turns into a fanclub hugfest over silly things, that bothers me. For example, the other day I visiting one of my favorite writing blogs and noticed that there were several dozen comments on a post that began with a (very lame) inspirational quote. The actual post was great, and I clicked through to the comments expecting to find a lively discussion about the post. Instead, it was a few dozen people saying thanks for that amazing quote. If it had been a profound quote, I might have understood. But it wasn’t. And worse, the folks saying they loved the quote didn’t seem very genuine about it; they were just joining in to thank an A-lister. Meanwhile, everyone seemed to have forgotten the rest of the post; no one was commenting on it. The discussion was more of a praise-fest and eventually turned into people discussing their favorite quotes, which is fine I suppose, and better than simply reading through even more thank-you posts. From that day on, this blogger has been adding quotations to many other posts, and now every day there are at least twenty people chiming in with thanks for the inspiration. It’s completely turned me off from reading the comments section and I’ve lost hope on there ever being another intelligent discussion at that blog.
Kelly — Don’t get me started on Oprah. I would have to take out a guest column on Friar’s rant section to cover that one.
Now, I’m curious how I’ve changed your life. *pokes the bear*
Amy,
Thanks
because that means I’m doing what I wanted to do with it. I haven’t monetized it or whatever because that isn’t the point of it, if it ever was. It’s just a lot of fun for me, an honest look inside of my brain and hopefully it comes across as just that (I guess it does, so thank you)
I hear what you’re saying, though. I know a few blogs like that. Nobody seems to read the post. It’s just a race to get “first post” to maybe attract traffic to their own blog.
Uh oh, Oprah’s in the hot seat! I just want to get on her show and flog my book when it’s finished… (yeah, yeah, workin’ on it!)
Brett Legree’s last blog post..viking fridays - everything you always wanted to know about life change*
@Amy, I haven’t seen a lot of arguments about whether or not to write for AC (which blogs am I missing on my RSS?) but I do agree with you — if writers want to post their work on AC, let them go ahead and do it. I do understand the concerns with AC and writers who work for free driving down the market value but I believe that the cream will always rise to the top
Back in the old days when I was on AOL (don’t laugh, it was the only option at the time), there were lots of flame wars on the message boards. I don’t run into many of them online though, maybe because I have an aversion to unnecessary drama!
Melissa Donovan’s last blog post..Work Your Jaws
@Amy
SHhhhh….Don’t question Oprah’s Authori-Tah.
(She knows all…and sees all)
By the way, I’m glad I didn’t see that post you decribed..My pancreas are already overloaded…one more sappy post, and I’d be going into a diabetic coma!
@Brett
I think you Blog is pretty cool too (and not just ‘coz you’re my buddy). There are a lot of cookie-cutter inspirational blogs out there, but yours stands out on it’s own.
I like the honesty you display…what you see, is what you get.
(Hope THAT’s not too touchy-feely, now!)
Friar’s last blog post..Basil the Special Dog (Update Part II)
Brett — The Oprah’s book club scares me. SHE scares me. Ack! (LOL) I think your blog is great. And you certainly don’t fit into any of the categories of people who sicken me… which means you’re very talented, because there are a lot of different kinds of people who make me want to puke.
Melissa — I haven’t seen a really GOOD debate on the subject for a while. Definitely none I would recommend subscribing to.
As far as AOL, I used them for a long time. I never used their message boards though. In general, I think forums and message boards do attract flame wars. And sadly, that tradition seems to be carrying over into blogs.
@Friar,
Oh, Friar, *sniff sniff* LOL seriously though thanks Brother, and I feel the same way about yours (and I’d say everyone here, too - we’re all unique)
@Amy,
Oprah sees all, knows all…
And hey, thanks for saying that. I feel the same, you know, about you - glad to be here chatting with you. It’s a breath of fresh air on your blog.
Brett Legree’s last blog post..viking fridays - everything you always wanted to know about life change*
Brett — I was thinking earlier, I wonder what your triplets’ blogs will be like when they are older (or if there will even be blog then).
@Amy
By then, we’ll all be disembodied heads floating in tanks of nutrient solution, and connected to each others’ conciousness by Microsoft MindMeld (TM) wireless networking.
Nobody would blog anymore. They’d just transmit thoughts to the Ether, in modified TextSpeak (LMAO IMHO ROLF LOL E.I. E.I. Ohhhhhh).
Friar’s last blog post..Basil the Special Dog (Update Part II)
Thank you. I AM intelligent and self respecting. Seriously, I paint in broad strokes on the blog. Online, I prefer dialogue to controversy.
Writer Dad — Thanks for stopping by. (And great blog name you have!) I think preferring dialogue to controversy is probably a good thing online. Saves a lot of time and keeps oneself out of trouble.
Amy,
So late getting back here to the awesome conversation you got started. Changed life: Can I say without being mushy, because you’re a bold chick? I don’t have to read 82 inspirational quotes from you to be inspired.
The funny thing about sappy-overload is, I love feeling inspired. I collect awesome sayings, I think positively, give myself annoying pep talks, and all that. But I like to ferret out inspiration for myself, from between the lines of fine writers/ speakers, etc. Force-fed inspiration is the turn-off.
You can’t try hard and suddenly *be* inspiring. People like you… –oh, all of you reading this, big hug– you *are* inspiring when you’re being honest.
Brett,
That carpenter does inspire still. Very true. Thank goodness he never had to be tempted by blog stats.
Friar,
“WWJB” is the kind of off-the-cuff thing that will make me think for days. That’s my kind of inspiration.
Later,
Kelly
Kelly’s last blog post..Observing Brilliant Service
See there, Friar. I’ll betcha Kelly would buy a nice WWJB tshirt.
I am bold. (Yay!) Quite the tall order to inspire someone with such cool shoes, so I’m honored. Really.
Which reminds me….
Brett — You totally SHOULD make me some shoes.
Amy,
I can do that. Right now I’m using Latigo leather, but if you want something else e.g. non-animal products, I can do that too.
Brett Legree’s last blog post..viking fridays - everything you always wanted to know about life change*
Brett — I will email you about this!
And now, back to the topic of controversy…
A perfect illustration of what I’m talking about:
How freelancewritinggigs.com Exploited Its Own Writers
To be fair, I will include the rebuttal:
Freelance Writing Jobs Accused of Scammery and Fraud
Amy,
Sounds great! You know, I think I’m on to something with the shoes… I’d better get a page up soon, I keep getting inquiries.
And just had a look at those two links… yep, that’s controversy alright…
Brett Legree’s last blog post..viking fridays - everything you always wanted to know about life change*
I actually wish that I stirred up more controversy at my blog … and a lot of time I’m surprised that I don’t. At the same time, I rarely join in the controversy fests at other blogs.
IrreverentFreelancer’s last blog post..The Ultimate Get-a-Clue Freelance Request for the Week of August 18, 2008
Kathy — I’m surprised you don’t too. At least your controversy is funny, which is more than I can say for most.
I wasn’t going to comment on this one, but I guess I’ll stick my little nose in (and hope it doesn’t get chopped off!
).
I guess I’d probably make most everyone here puke with all my positive, inspiring posts - on both my blogs. The thing is, after barely surviving domestic violence, battling depression and suicidal thoughts, I have found writing inspirational pieces, writing to encourage others, has been most healing for me.
I realize life is brutal and reality is most times dark (believe me, I know… I’ve come from there) but it doesn’t mean I (personally) should choose to dwell on it. Sometimes, when you come across inspiring posts that are just “over the top” in your opinion it might just be because the author is trying to encourage themselves…
*smiles*
Michele
Michele’s last blog post..Raw Juice Recipes for Beautiful Skin
Michele — I am glad you commented, and I don’t think anyone here has very long claws.
I think there’s a difference. You are an inspirational writer, and folks who visit your blog know what to expect. If they don’t like inspirational writing, then clearly they probably wouldn’t be your ideal readership. I won’t speak for everyone — that always gets me into trouble
— but I think the annoyance factor is more for business-related blogs. If, for example, copyblogger started handing out group hugs, that would be weird. Just as I think it would be out of place if you, on your inspirational blog, started a huge flame war on a fellow blogger just to create controversy and bring in a bit of traffic. The out-of-character-to-boost-readership thing seems to be what most folks have a problem with… or, well, at least in my case. 
Michele,
I agree with Amy. I may not be your ideal reader, but I certainly don’t begrudge people the right to be inspirational and upbeat on their blogs. Lots of people do need that, and there can be quite a lot of depth in using your own experiences to inform your message.
Especially if the message helps others to know they are not alone. [insert secret handshake here] Keep doing what you’re doing. Those who are at the moment where they need to hear it will appreciate what you write.
Regards,
Kelly
Kelly’s last blog post..Observing Supercars
Thanks Amy and Kelly! I appreciate your comments. That’s what I’m going for… just helping folks know they aren’t alone and that they can make it. It might be cheesy to some, but to me it’s a huge part of my life to be that encouragement. I’m just grateful to be alive and have that opportunity.
*smiles*
Michele
Michele’s last blog post..Raw or Store-bought Juices?
Kelly — Supercars? I’m intrigued…
Michele — I’m very glad you’re alive.
P.S. I also read the stories of yours and your moms published in the book you sent. You really have had an interesting life!
Let me just add to the reassurance, Michele. There’s DEFINITELY a place for your type of writing in the blogosphere. We all need a little positivity in our life. In fact, I’m going to make a confession. Some days, I wish I could be a little bit more upbeat with my posts, but my blog wasn’t designed for that purpose. People just don’t come to my blog for a group hug. LOL So, when I’m just not feeling up for adding to the world’s negativity, I just just skip a day or go off topic. And those are the days I’d be most likely to turn to your blog.
IrreverentFreelancer’s last blog post..The Ultimate Get-a-Clue Freelance Request for the Week of August 18, 2008
Thank you, Amy! Oh, those little short pieces aren’t even the half of it - seriously! I should start a series of books on the different events.
I’m glad you enjoyed them, though! And, I’m glad you’re glad I’m alive. hehe
Kathy, I appreciate you speaking up to reassure me. How sweet! I’ll admit, I’ve had days where I read your posts too. I’d never have the guts to do what you do and imagine the horror of my readers who come for encouragement to arrive at my blog one day and find I had morphed into you. Oh my goodness, that’d be bonkers! hehe And, you’re welcome at my blog anytime. I only hope I can do my job and inspire you once you’re there!
*smiles*
Michele
Michele’s last blog post..Raw Juice Recipes for Beautiful Skin
Michele — I was a little sad the stories weren’t longer. Maybe you can start a 407th blog with your mom to write the full story on all the events.
Kathy — I always read your blog when I’m feeling particularly snarky. Your blog rocks. I do think it would be a fun little experiment for you and Michele to exchange guest posts. See how many people on both sides drop dead.
(Oh wait… that would be mean…)
Please do comment and discuss.
We love a good conversation!
Please use a name when commenting. Does not have to be your real name or full name. But responding to folks calling themselves "Make Money Writing Online" and such kinda sucks. Calling yourself keywords will likely get you thrown into my spam filter.