Mar
16
My friends always know where to find me on a weekend: at home in front of my laptop. Why? I am a sucker for the needy. Want to be an idiot like me? In five easy steps, you too can turn a perfectly good day off into work.
Step 1: Check your email.
As you’re settling into that cup of morning java, make sure to give into that little voice that says “you’ve got mail.” Don’t bother arguing with the lure of it, throwing about petty phrases like “me time,” because you know you’ll give in eventually. Procrastinate later.
Step 2: Search for the words “urgent” or “emergency.”
You are a writer. Lives depend on your services. Somewhere in the black hole of your inbox will be someone whose very next breath depends on your ability to Google “raw milk production” and produce a well-researched article on statistics that don’t exist.
Step 3: Feel obligated to respond.
You may think it can wait until tomorrow, but why fool yourself? This man is dying for knowledge. Isn’t it your job to educate him? Or at least not leave him hanging?
Step 4: Agree to do just one thing.
Once you’ve made contact, you’ll know where this is going. As he whines about the prices of the timeshares in Arizona, interjecting a random thought about that rush job here or there, you’ll know where you’ve gone wrong. But there’s no going back now. Your billable clock is ticking.
Step 5: Repeat as needed.
If by some chance you manage to satiate his hunger for human contact before sundown, don’t fret. That tiny flashing envelope will reappear in the corner of your screen before long.
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11 Responses to “5 Easy Steps to Turn a Day Off Into Work”
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About Amy Derby
Formerly a corporate paralegal, I ditched the pantyhose to begin freelancing in 2004. I enjoy long walks to the coffee maker, never setting an alarm clock, and not wearing a bra to the (home) office. I can be reached at amy.derby (at) gmail.com.
LOL you are a great person.I just love to visit your blog(s)
I work just about every weekend. I try to tone it down a little on Saturday and Sunday but there’s just so much to do. I’d really like to at least take off one day a week. It’s good for your health, you know!
Melissa Donovan
@Mike - Thanks! You’re too kind. I’m still dying to know what’s in your picture there. LOL
@Melissa - I recently started taking a class and attending a quit-smoking group on Wednesdays, so that’s become my closest thing to a day off. It is about a four hour commute both ways, factoring in the walk to the train and such. Last week, I did get home at 10pm and tend to some work, but I’m hoping to restrain myself this week.
My days off were turning into work days so I had to ban myself from going on the computer one day a week to give myself a break.
I like your blog, btw.
I think I work harder on my days off than I do on work days. :o/
I eat cookies, play video games and watch back episodes of LOST when I go to work…on my days off I change the world.
@Rebecca - Seriously, that’s the only way to go. My latest problem is that I bought an iPhone, so now even when I’m not on my computer I’m working.
Thanks for visiting!
@Jay - I want your cookie eating video game playing job. Where do I sign up for one of those?
This is so very you. I’m cracking up.
LOL, this sounds like most of my days off. Why do clients always seem to have emergencies on the weekend?
Oh Amy, I can’t stop laughing! We workaholics know exactly what you’re talking about.
Everyone I know bugs me about not having an iPhone or BlackBerry.
But these are the same people who respond to email during a church service, their kid’s school play and while on vacation sipping a rum punch on a beach.
Yeah. That’s real healthy.
I know me well enough to know that I would do the same thing if I owned one of those things.
Frankly, if a client can’t wait until Monday (and it happens repeatedly), I’m not a good fit for them.
@ Angie - I thought you might like this one.
@ Debra - Thanks for stopping by. Your blog is awesome. I do think you could be my long-lost rant twin! Seriously, my clients are needy all the time, and I really don’t mind. True emergencies rarely come up. It’s the workaholism mentality (I have it, and they have it) that makes me laugh. I rarely stop and think, “Hey, it’s the weekend. I could be lounging around watching television instead of talking to this client about his new big screen television.”
@ Lori - I’m happy you get it, but sad for you at the same time. I hope you’re not as pathetically addicted to work as I am.
@ Ed - I was a recovering blackberry addict for about a year, and then I got my iphone. It’s VERY addicting, but I love it. And yes, I use it everywhere. I’m obnoxious like that. I’m about halfway through your book, btw. It’s very good so far.